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Yoors trooly Petroleum V Nasby
NASBY.
DIVERS VIEWS, OPINIONS, AND Prophecies OF Yoors Trooly Petroleum V Nasby Lait Paster uv the Church of the Noo Dispensashun WITH HUMOROUS DESIGNS BY THEE JONES.
CINCINNATI: R. W. Carroll & Co., Publishers, JOS. L. TOPHAM & CO., General Agents, (Opera-House Building.)
1866.Entered according to Act of Congress, in the year 1865, by R. W. CARROLL & CO., In the Clerk's Office of the District Court of the United States for the Southern District of Ohio.
DEDIKASHEN.
TO THAT STERLIN PATRYOT AND UNKORRUPTIBLE CHRISCHEN GENTLEMAN,
FERNANDYWOOD, UV
NOO YORK:
TO THAT HI-TONED MAN AND WOOL-DIED DIMEKRAT,
FRANKLIN PEERSE, UV NOO
HAMPSHIRE;
TO THAT LONG-SUFFRIN BUT PASHENT DIMEKRAT,
JESSE D. BRITE, UV
INJEANY,
Whose highest recommendashun is that he wuz eckspelled frum a Ablishn
Senit, but
who wood hev resined hed ther ever bin a presedent fer a Dimekrat
resinin;
AND TO THE GRATE
VALLANDIGUM, UV OHIO,
Who went to the stake
with a kamness onparrallelled, fer prinsipple,
These Book
IS RESPECTFULLY
DEDIKATED, BY
THE ORTHER.
Saint's Rest, (which is in the Stait uv Noo Gersey,) November the 1st, 1865.PRESIDENT LINCOLN'S INDORSEMENT OF NASBY.
The subjoined account of President LINCOLN'S high appreciation of the wit and humor of Nasby was contributed to the New York Independent, by F. B. CARPENTER, Esq., the artist, who enjoyed the confidence of our late lamented Chief Magistrate, and whose reminiscences have an authenticity entitling them to implicit credit. Mr. CARPENTER says:
"The Saturday evening before President Lincoln left Washington, to go to the front, just previous to the capture of Richmond, I was with him from seven o'clock till nearly twelve. It had been a very hard day with him. The pressure of office-seekers was greater at this juncture than I ever knew it to be, and he was almost worn out. Among the callers that evening was a party composed of a Senator, a Representative, an ex-Lieutenant Governor of a Western State, and several private citizens. They had business of great importance, involving the necessity of the President's examination of voluminous documents. Pushing every thing aside, he said to one of the party, 'Have you seen the Nasby Papers?' 'No, I have not,' was the answer. 'Who is Nasby?' 'There is a chap out in Ohio,' returned the President, 'who has been writing a series of letters in the newspapers over the signature of Petroleum V. Nasby. Some one sent me a pamphlet collection of them the other day. I am going to write to "Petroleum" to come down here, and I intend to tell him if he will communicate his talent to me, I will swap places with him!' Thereupon he arose, went to a drawer in his desk, and taking out the 'letters,' he sat down and read one to the company, finding in their enjoyment of it the temporary excitement and relief which another man would have found in a glass of grog! The instant he had ceased, the book was thrown aside, his countenance relapsed into its habitual serious expression, and the business was entered upon with the utmost earnestness."
page: x-xi (Table of Contents) [View Page x-xi (Table of Contents) ]CONTENTS.
- I. How he came to be a Democrat. 25
- II. Wingert's Corners Secedes. 28
- III. Negro Emigration. 31
- IV. Oad to Peece. 34
- V. Has an Interview with Vallandigham. 36
- VI. Proposes to Celebrate the Fourth. 40
- VII. Annihilates an Oberlinite. 43
- VIII. Makes a Candidate "uv Hisself." 46
- IX. Shows why he should not be Drafted. 52
- X. In Canada. 54
- XI. Is finally Drafted. 57
- XII. Deserts—His Experience in Clothes. 60
- XIII. Captures a Turkey. 65
- XIV. Improves his Fortunes by Marriage. 68
- XV. Converses with a Southern Soldier. 70
- XVI. At Home. 73
- XVII. Assists Draft Resisters. 76
- XVIII. Strategises. 79
- XIX. Addresses the Soldiers. 81
- XX. Organizes a Democratic Church. 84
- XXI. Goes on with his Church. 87
- XXII. "Capcherd." 90
- XXIII. Starts a Paper. 93
- XXIV. Preaches and makes a Sudden Shift. 96
- XXV. Observes a Day of Fasting. 99
- XXVI. Visits Vallandigham. 102
- XXVII. Converses with a Brother. 107
- XXVIII. Confession of Faith. 110
- page: xii (Table of Contents) -xiii (Table of Contents) [View Page xii (Table of Contents) -xiii (Table of Contents) ]
- XXIX. Preaches—Subject: "Givin." 113
- XXX. Visits Camp Dennison to Electioneer for Vallandigham. 116
- XXXI. In the "Apossel Biznis." 119
- XXXII. Waileth. 122
- XXXIII. "Changes his Base." 125
- XXXIV. Has an Interview with the President. 128
- XXXV. Preaches. 132
- XXXVI. Proposes to Restore the Union. 136
- XXXVII. A Plan for the Salvation of the Democratic Party. 139
- XXXVIII. Takes a Retrospective View. 142
- XXXIX. Communes with Spirits. 145
- XL. Tries an Experiment. 149
- XLI. Addresses Jefferson Davis. 152
- XLII. Establishes African Slavery. 155
- XLIII. Opposes the Nomination of a Military Man. 159
- XLIV. Preaches—Subject: "The Prodigal Son." 163
- XLV. Dreams. 167
- XLVI. Tries to Awaken an Interest. 172
- XLVII. Recommends Unanimity. 176
- XLVIII. Again Repudiates McClellan, and Reasons Therefor. 179
- XLIX. Ordains a Missionary. 182
- L. Will Support McClellan. 186
- LI. Gives Thanks. 189
- LII. Waileth. 192
- LIII. Fremont's Nomination. 195
- LIV. Nominates a Ticket. 198
- LV. Addresses Jefferson Davis. 200
- LVI. On the Return of Vallandigham. 203
- LVII. Defines his Position, and Appeals for Aid. 206
- LVIII. Declares for Repudiation and Union with the South. 210
- LIX. Shows that a War Platform won't do for the Democracy. 213
- LX. Has a Class Meeting and Deprecates Negro Killing. 216
- LXI. Starts a Society of his Own. 219
- LXII. Indorses the Nomination. 222
- LXIII. The Candidates and Platform. 226
- LXIV. Waileth Muchly. 230
- LXV. Despondent. 233
- LXVI. Lamenteth. 235
- LXVII. The Planter's Lament. 238
- LXVIII. Has a Dream. 240
- LXIX. Loses a Friend, and Writes his Obituary. 244
- LXX. Issues an "Appele." 248
- LXXI. Has a Difficulty with his Flock and Leaves it. 252
- LXXII. Ye Lament of Joseph Bowers. 255
- LXXIII. Takes a Retrospective View. 262
- LXXIV. Deprecates the Arming of the Slaves by the South. 266
- LXXV. Has a Frightful Dream. 269
- LXXVI. Proposes the Emigration of the Democracy. 272
- LXXVII. Consults the Spirits. 276
- LXXVIII. "Waileth and Cusseth." 279
- LXXIX. Renounces Slavery. 283
- LXXX. Lamenteth. 285
- LXXXI. Lines onto O. P. Morton, the Tirent uv Injeany. 288
- LXXXII. Details the Failures of the Democracy. 290
- LXXXIII. Mr. Nasby and his Friends on the Fall of Charleston. 292
- LXXXIV. Lamenteth over the Apostacy of the Saints. 297
- LXXXV. The Fall of Richmond and Lee's Surrender. 300
- LXXXVI. The Assassination 304
- LXXXVII. "Makes a Delegashun uv Hisself." 307
- LXXXVIII. Sonnit—2 a Litter uv Little Pigs. 311
- LXXXIX. Has a Vision. 312
- XC. Lays Down a Platform for the Coming Campaign. 317
- XCI. Sonnit—2 a Old Hoss 321
- XCII. Meets a "Reconstructid Suthern Shivelry." 322
- XCIII. "Dreams a Dream." 327
- XCIV. Sonnit—2 Whisky. 331
- XCV. Issues an Address to the Southern Democracy. 332
- XCVI. Searches the Scriptures, and gets Comfort Therefrom. 336
- XCVII. Suggests a "Psalm of Sadness" for his friends South. 339
- XCVIII. Has a Dream which Unveils the Future. 343
- page: xiv (Table of Contents) -xv (List of Illustrations) [View Page xiv (Table of Contents) -xv (List of Illustrations) ]
- XCIX. Opposes the Nomination of Soldiers. 349
- C. Sonnit—2 Hanner Ann. 353
- CI. Meets a Pardoned Rebel, who Enlightens Him. 354
- CII. The Wise Old Rat. 361
- CIII. Sonnit—2 my Nose. 365
- CIV. The Diskontentid Pezant. 366
- CV. Sonnit—2 a Skeeter. 371
- CVI. Embarks in a New Enterprise. 372
- CVII. Indulges in a Reminiscence of his Youthful Days. 375
- CVIII. Sonnit—2 a Korn. 380
- CIX. On the Diversity of the Races. 381
- CX. Sonnit—2 a Five-cent Piece. 385
- CXI. On Southern Character. 386
- CXII. A Horrible Vision. 390
- CXIII. Has a Conversation with the Devil. 398
- CXIV. Appeal to the Democracy. 403
- CXV. After the October Elections, 1865. 407
- CXVI. The Bow-Legged Knite. 411
- CXVII. Gives his Experience in Negro Impudence. 416
- CXVIII. A few Last Words. 420
ILLUSTRATIONS.
- TITLE PAGE. 1
- PORTRAIT. 2
- NASBY DESERTS—HIS EXPERIENCE IN CLOTHES. 63
- NASBY VISITS VALLANDIGHAM. 103
- NASBY'S DREAM OF GREATNESS. 169
- NASBY HAS A DIFFICULTY WITH HIS FLOCK AND LEAVES IT. 255
- YE LAMENT OF JOSEPH BOWERS. 257
- THE UNION AS IT WAS. 355